Nurse in Transition
I'm currently seeking advice as I'm job hunting after being laid off about six months ago. I'm trying to remain confident and hopeful. I'm a nurse and need to find my next job ASAP. I have so many bills. I hope this is my life path -- helping others. What's next for me? Also, I have a male friend who I got a little closer to over the past several months. I have feelings for him, however I only see him at one particular dance club. When I go (occasionally), he's so happy to see me and we end up talking, laughing, dancing and enjoying each others' company. However, outside the club he never contacts me. I did tell him that it would be nice if he just called to say "hi," no pressure. He says I want to get married, and that's the reason we can't go out. I told him that I have so much on my plate and I'm not looking for marriage right now. I said we could just spend time together because we enjoy each other, with no strings attached. When I do see him, he makes me happy. I just don't understand where he's coming from. I'm also a single parent of a freshman in college. He's a good kid going through changes. I wonder how things are going to work out for him? Life is interesting, isn't it?
Kim, NY, NY
You're in the midst of great change. Change is good, but it can feel overwhelming. Especially if it means letting go of some comfortable, old ideas. Let me deal with job/money first. It seems that you might have some limiting notions about how successful and prosperous you can actually be. A lot of heart-centered, care-giving types of women believe service and money can't exist happily together. That's one thing that's happening for you. You don't seem to be able to imagine an expanded job description, and since the old work doesn't fit you quite as well anymore, you have a dilemma. I have many nurses as clients, and I've listened to them over the years as they radically redefined what nursing means to them. New options exist and I've watched them create their own reality about employment, rather than trying to fit themselves into the tiny slots that other people have to offer them. Money will continue to be a problem until you expand the possibilities of how it can come to you. You might find my guided hypnotherapy CD (Manifesting Prosperity) helpful. Your fear is keeping you from claiming your next, courageous step. About the fellow at the dance club: He's being very honest with you. Not only is he unwilling to have a committed, serious relationship with anyone, he does intuit that you want more than he can deliver. He's right about you. You do want a marriage-type commitment. It's perfectly OK for you to want what you want and to honestly acknowledge that for yourself. It's also perfectly OK that he can't be that for you. What he gives you at the club is all there is for him to give. You will drive yourself nuts if you project your desires on him. Contemplate gathering the courage to allow someone with all his good qualities, plus the ability to make a commitment, to be attracted into your life. Right now you're sending out mixed messages. Regarding your son: Have a chat with him. He needs some guidance right now. He's about to make a poor decision.