The Psychic Counselor

Do you have questions about life changes? Emotional concerns? Relationship issues? Spiritual matters? Send your questions to The Psychic Counselor, Lynda Hilburn, and check back here for your answers. Or you can read through the previous posts (check the Archives) to find answers you didn't even have questions for! LyndaSoul@aol.com. [*LyndaSoul isn't my name -- it's the combo of my first name with the first word in the name of my hypnotherapy training school.]

Friday, April 28, 2006

Misguided Move

Dear Lynda:
My husband’s parents suddenly decided to move from our small town in Nevada to a town in Kentucky where they know no one. My husband at first was not happy that they wanted to leave our town were we all grew up in, then he decided to move with them. So being the supportive wife I should be, I agreed to a move. I am giving up my family who live on the west coast and leaving my parents who only live a few blocks from me. I guess that my problem is that since we have put our house up for sale my husband is constantly worried about it selling. He hounds me every time he calls, “Is the house clean, and has anyone come by to look at it?” I am not sure if it’s bothering me because I am pregnant, but all I can think about is if I don’t do everything he says that it will get him even more upset. My questions would be: Are we going to sell soon? Will he find a good job? And will my parents be okay with me not here to help them? I know that things do work out for a higher purpose and that I am drawn to Kentucky maybe from a past life but have not figured that out yet. I do feel like if things do not work out the way my husband wants them to that it might affect our marriage. I don’t know how to handle this all on my own and take care of my son and soon a baby. Thank you for your time.
Kristen, Nevada

Dear Kristen:
I'm assuming you are determined to make this move, so please take my feedback with a grain of salt. I'm very concerned that your adult husband has made such an ill-advised decision, based on very flimsy information. I don't think it is necessary to be a "supportive wife," if it means doing what someone else wants you to do (especially this particular situation) rather than what your intuition tells you. I'm convinced you have no desire to go to Kentucky, and you are only going because you lack confidence in yourself. Perhaps you've never had the opportunity to learn to trust yourself, and following someone else's dictates is likely just a habit for you. I think everything about this move is suspect. Nothing seems to be flowing smoothly. What seems to happen for most people (or at least from my limited vantage point) is that when something is in alignment with their deepest desires, things just magically work out. There is no need to stress about houses selling or how a new life will be. Your husband's emotional state concerns me and I hope he doesn't take his psychological confusion out on you and your children. I would guess that you love him very much in order to uproot your life like this, but I don't see clear evidence of that. So, I can only hope that you'll find your strength and make a decision for you and your children about what you want to do with your life. Kentucky doesn't feel like a good match for you. Your husband is behaving immaturely. Please keep in touch and let me know how things unfold.
Lynda