Vampirism?

Dear Lynda: This is probably a strange question but I am very curious. First of all I am a decent educated guy, mid 30's, excellent physical shape, still have canine like teeth upper and lower, I am currently in the Army and serve in an elite unit working in the intelligence field. Ever since I was in high school I have been drawn to the vampire culture, not goth, but the life of a vampire. I have been curious and fascinated and have tried telling myself that they don't exist. But deep down somewhere I know they do. I also feel like there is something inside of me that wants to rip out of me. I am somewhat of an adrenaline junky and currently skydive (through work and civilian), I ski, mountain bike, and have volunteered for over five combat tours (not bragging, I just needed to get away from the mundane life). I like the night time, working at night and playing at night. I prefer the clouds and rain and mountains with lush forest. I am not a fan of the sun but do live a life in it but do occasionally feel like I am drained of energy. I will be dead tired almost asleep and force myself to stay awake during the day especially when it gets close to the evening time. But as soon as the sun is down I am wide awake and feel alive, hard to sleep and I have to force and medicate sometimes to do this. I am married for over seven years and have kept this only to myself. This could be just something that some people get and have nothing to do with vampires, I am not superhumanly strong, nor can I fly, but I often feel the need to and want to, even dream about it quite often. But that could be just normal behavior of man wanting the things he can't have or do. I appreciate you taking the time to read this and ask for your help if I need it, like I said, this could be just the fantasy of a life I would like to have instead of thinking that I am not special in that way as in the inert feeling of we are all special in some way. Thanks for your help.
JRC, Colorado

Dear JRC: It sounds like you need to find ways to express the parts of yourself that are still being squelched. Regardless of whether or not vampires exist (I hope they do), it seems you have enhanced awareness in certain areas and it would be a shame to continue to repress them. Actually, if you are truly as you represent yourself, I get no sense that you're unhealthy. So, here's my advice: explore the other aspects of your consciousness. Meditate. Stop trying to conform (except in ways you must for your livelihood.) Write. Yes. Write. Fiction. Where do you think vampire writers get their motivations/inspirations from? The imagination is a powerful tool. Begin. Now.
Best, Lynda (let me know when you've written something and I'll have lots of advice about where to go next)