The Psychic Counselor

Do you have questions about life changes? Emotional concerns? Relationship issues? Spiritual matters? Send your questions to The Psychic Counselor, Lynda Hilburn, and check back here for your answers. Or you can read through the previous posts (check the Archives) to find answers you didn't even have questions for! [*LyndaSoul isn't my name -- it's the combo of my first name with the first word in the name of my hypnotherapy training school.]

Saturday, April 23, 2005


Dear Lynda:
Thank you for your time and consideration. I'm desperate for a solution and any advice is very welcome. For the last two years, I have been "spell bound" by a man who has nothing to offer me emotionally, spiritually or sexually. I am unable to walk away or experience positive changes that might lead me away from this dark place. I'm overwhelmed by feelings of powerlessness and despair. Is this man evil, or have I been sentenced to a karmic lesson assigned to me by other forces? Is there anything I can do to turn this situation around?
Jo, Texas

Dear Jo: The great news is that you are on the threshold of making new, powerful choices for yourself and your life. The time period from January through June of 2005 is lush with opportunities for new decisions, new directions and deep personal growth. You are really starting to see how the old patterns, ideas, beliefs, etc. aren't working for you. This man is a part of the old. Nothing that has been happening to you regarding this man is about something he is doing to you, or something someone/something else is doing to you. It is completely and totally about your choices. Sometimes, our patterns are so deeply entrenched that they are invisible to us. We can't see that the motivation for us to continue on the same hamster wheel comes from inside ourselves. That is definitely the case here. It is absolutely untrue that you are spell bound. We can only be spell bound if we choose to be. (Although, I'll admit it is enlivening to co-create that kind of dramatic passion!) You are able to walk away. You simply haven't chosen to do that. Is it easy? Apparently not. Will it be strange to call on the strong parts of yourself instead of following along with old, inner programming? Yes. Can you do it? Without doubt. I have to tell you that I don't see any darkness ahead for you. Of course, you can keep bringing the old experiences with you by continuing to focus your attention on them. You can't create the change you want if you hold fast to the negatives you say you wish to transform. Humans have such a huge capacity for what we call "evil," but what is also true is that we align with what we give attention to. So, I wonder what would happen if you stopped feeding this particular fire? It is totally up to you.